It’s NOVEMBER and National Adoption Month. This is my absolute favorite time of the year. Autumn days, leaves falling, pumpkins, cooler temperatures and the consistent reminder that it is a time to give thanks. For me, there are so many reasons to be thankful.
I am thankful for the simple things in life. I am very thankful for our neighbor who brought over the delicious scones she baked. My children and I enjoyed the stories those scones brought out from my husband, about his grandmother’s scones from his childhood memories. It makes me so happy when my children do their chores without having to be reminded. Nothing is better than an unsolicited hug from my son or another great report card from school for my daughter. I most enjoy a conversation with my sisters where we laugh so hard that we are crying. I am so touched every time I receive a card in the mail from someone, for any reason, whatsoever. I am thankful for a simple thank you – be it because I made an enjoyable meal or because we’ve helped in an adoption. It is always nice to receive a message on fb from a special friend who is checking in or letting me know that they are praying for me. My heart is touched with the flowers my husband picks or buys, puts in a vase and places on the table for me to “find”.
These simple, regular things keep me grounded and sane.
I used to be the girl who liked the grand things in life and now I find myself just loving life for the good things it has to offer and appreciating the lessons from the tough times. I used to be on this quest to the bigger and better and now I am happy with just being happy. There was a time that there was no satisfaction, because if there was – than that would mean I was settling or missing out. And now, I find, I have so much and am happier than ever.
As I share these things with the women I life coach or speak to, it is to hopefully have them be drawn into the drama free gift of joy that our God so freely offers us. Romans 15:13 shares – “May the God of hope fill you with all joy and peace as you trust in him, so that you may overflow with hope by the power of the Holy Spirit.” I love this verse. It promises us that under ANY circumstance – even the hardest one – IF we trust in the Lord, than we can still feel joy and peace and can have hope. Yes – joy, peace and hope, even during the saddest, loneliest, darkest time.
Believe me, I have had many a dark time in my life. It is always so good to be on the other side, but I now so appreciate the faith building that takes place during and because of those times. There has been much pain, as I reflect, that was self imposed due to my own choices. Loss of self respect and heart break because of wrong decisions, based primarily on the emotions I was feeling in that moment. In turn, these choices caused a void between me and the Lord or me and someone else. Yet, some of the darkest times have not been by my own choice – like the loss of my babies through miscarriage. There was such shock & disbelief that the little being that I had instantaneously bonded with and loved was suddenly gone – along with all the dreams I had for them. Or the loss of my husband’s successful company several years ago and subsequently, the loss of our home. At that time, it seemed the loss of our comfort and financial security was so overwhelming.
Adoption is one of those situations where typically, some sort of loss has been experienced from a different perspective – on both sides – before or during the adoption plan. For adoptive parents, it sometimes is the reasons leading up to the decision to adopt. For others, it is the waiting that hurts or possibly the loss of a matched situation. For birth moms, the lack of family support or the actual placement may be the most painful. There is no comparison – pain is pain.
Whatever the cause, whatever the grief, I have learned that we have an amazingly faithful God. He is there for us to turn to. He is there for us to trust Him to carry us through. He IS there, and IF we trust Him, then He will provide that joyful peace that can only come from Him. How do I know? Because I have actually experienced it. Not always – because I am human and have bad habits and control issues at times. Lol! But, during those times (which are now more often) that I do really put my trust in Him, I experience that joy and/or peace that passes all understanding – even if I am under the most tremendous stress or going through something that causes me grief and sadness.
This month, I am most thankful for the joy and peace, along with the hope that the Lord can so simply provide for us. All we need to do is trust Him.